“Hey, you’re a guy…”

Even though I don’t agree fully with biological determinism or most generalizations about gender, I recognize why people think that way or make those generalizations.

Still, I get irked when people don’t recognize that generalizations—no matter how true they may be for a large percentage of aggregate groups—do not apply to every member of a demographic.

Most men may like sports, but not all guys do. Most women may like shopping, but not all women do.

If you want to generalize and say “most,” I have no problem with that. But don’t box me in. Don’t say “Hey, you’re a guy…” because I am not a guy. I don’t like sports. I don’t have upper body strength. I’m squeamish about snakes, spiders, and rats. I enjoy the company of women more than I do the company of men. I don’t take up extra space when sitting down or invade other people’s personal spaces.

Still, I get situations where people say things like “Hey, you’re a guy. Can you lift this heavy object for me?” or “Hey, you’re a guy. Can you catch this spider for me?” I swear—this happened to me just yesterday at work, so I responded, “I don’t like spiders either. I’ll do it as a favor if you don’t make it a gender thing.” That’s the best I can do. I’m a human, not “a guy.” I may enjoy many of the benefits society gives men. I have the proper anatomy to be classed male. I even smell when I sweat. Still, don’t box me in. I don’t do anything “because [I'm] a guy.” Some of the things I do are from being raised male. Some of the things I do are from other environmental factors not related to gender. Some, believe it or not, are actually my own choice.

Don’t box me in. I am not a guy.